New Years Eve today, what a year it's been for Lola. I've travelled extensively, holidayed in places where the natives have rings through their noses, improved my appreciation of wine, listened to some of the finest music, attended concerts of the highest note, eaten in the finest of restaurants and grown fantastic runner beans.

I like to think, also, that my character has improved, I've certainly had a bigger speaking part this year, oh how I crave the spotlight yet shy away from glamour - funny that.

I only seem to have upset a couple of people this year instead of the normal handful, hopefully I have brought happiness to a few, not like Diana who touched the hearts of millions (surely a woman who believed in quantity not quality) Anyhow, I wish all my readers the best of times for 2003, let's hope we can nip this trouble with the Gulf in the bag, atleast improve our stroke anyway.

OH, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MR CLIVE TOMORROW!

Back at work and I am finding it all a bit of an inconvenience, I don't really want to be here. I'd rather be playing with my breadmaker, I have read up on a load of handy tips on how to turn out the perfect loaf. We have decided to set up a bread business called "Sue and Lou's Krusty Bloomers " where we will ply our trade at craft fairs and unusual municipal events.
Look out for our stands in the summer.

Woke up this morning intent on having a go on one of Mr Drew and Mr Clive's xbox games, alas, my head feels a little fragile to concentrate and so I returned to bed with a cup of tea. I've been on the internet instead looking at houses and Prince Charles. The chaps have a constant broadband internet connection so I can stay online for as long as I want to! Two more days left unitl I have to return to work, I have enjoyed the Christmas break, I feel as relaxed as warm putty.
The ladyfriend and I have been given a breadmaker for Christmas and this weekend we shall be churning out loaves, we will be so skilled at the art of bread making that every one will want to get a sniff of our bloomers!
Oh, one last thing, check out my stepdad's website that the ladyfriend and I made for him for Christmas: www.jimsimmonds.co.uk

It's Friday 27th December and the ladyfriend and I are babysitting Mr Clive and Mr Drew's house whilst they are away in Newcastle. We are having a nice time and have already sunk two bottles of red wine and 3/4 of a packet of chilli crisps, oh we do like to live the high life. This is probably the third property we have looked after this year and our nomadic lifestyle is quite addictive - and so are the chilli crisps.
This time next year the ladyfriend and I are adament that we shall have our own property, be it a flat in Thame or the Isle of Wight but whatever the fortunes decide we will both be two stone lighter!
So after the Christmas excess, and I have had excess of it, comes the fasting, the crimping and the scrimping, I must halt gravity and depravity before things get beyond control and surgery is the only answer.
I have done awfully well this Christmas, I have a new wok, an electric toothbrush, a Noel Coward cd and a posh set of scales. I have been tapping and unwrapping since Sunday and can see no end to the orgy of greed. There's still smoked salmon in the fridge and a whole duck! Got to pack it away before New Years Eve but there is just so much temptation. Why do they make nibbley snacks so appealing?

The ladyfriend and I are off in a while to Glastonbury for the night, we do like our mini breaks! This weekend is gonna be lovely. We are spending sunday (22nd) with Mr Clive and Mr Drew as our Christmas day, it's the official midwinter solstice thing and apparently it's going to be a good'en because all the planets are lined up in quite a portentious way. Who knows what it might signify, perhaps the second coming? I wonder what would happen to Christmas if he was born again? Would we have to stop and cast century old celebrations aside? Perhaps we would deny his existence so we could keep up this vulgar greed and indulgence. It's worth pondering.

Aaaah! My last day at work today and I am so ready to embrace the Christmastide spirt. Unfortunately the Lady Friend has not shown the same amount of reserve and has embraced it whole heartedly, so much so that I have had to drive her to work this morning! We feared the Rozzers would throw the book at her if they had caught her at the wheel marinated in Rioja.
All this was made possible because of a little over indulgence at Mac and Mabel's last night, several bottles were opened and we went through to the games room. I must say the Lady Friend is adapting to her new lifestyle and is becoming (under my steady tuition) rather good at pool. I shall be able to take her to the East End one day and let her debut at the baize in Bermondsey.

I must just say a Merry Christmas to you all, Life for Lola may go a lil slack for a while (I fear we may all have this coming to us) but I shall attempt to post where possible. Hope you get what you wish for on Christmas Morning or atleast what you deserve.

Two more days of work and that's it, off, away in a whirlwind of fairy glitter! I am very happy indeed although I am trying to put a lid on it and contain my frisson....atleast until tomorrow. The lady friend and I are off to Glastonbury on Friday to escape the chaos of the high street and get charged up on the old ley lines. I feel like a skaletrix car which has hurtled round a bend and come off track - and I've got a dirty great spot to show for it. I sprayed perfume on it this morning and now everytime I stick my tongue out when I concentrate I get a taste of Clinique.

If anyone has not yet seen Mr Clive on the Bucks Free Press website, take a look now as he is the front page picture today!
www.bucksfreepress.co.uk

I am in such buoyant spirits, I love life and I love my ladyfriend, it is indeed the season to be jolly.
This change in mood I can best put down to the uplifting trance I am listening to at the moment. It's very bouncy, some bint is singing along to someone on a hammond organ about how love is lovely and her sincerity is very effective.
It's great this music, it makes me jig to and throw in my office chair. My chair is great, not top of the range but it has up, down, back and forward, I can adapt any postition at the flick of a switch!
I think they should pipe this sort of music into Iraq, Ireland and Israel (hang on a minute, troubled hotspots all beginning with I, perhaps I'm on to something here) there would be little time for shocking human rights, weapons of mass destruction and suicide bombings with this sort of music going on. Imagine, all strapped up ready to board a bus when all of a sudden "I love you til the sky falls down ", I know I'd put off meeting Allah for another chorus.

Wow, what a feast the Ladyfriend and I enjoyed last night at Mr Clive and Mr Drew's. I feel like a bowling ball at the moment and Christmas is not yet underway. By twelth night I shall look like Montserrat Caballe .
Mr Clive is being fingered by the local newspaper buying public in south bucks at the moment, his buggery hit the headlines and he is now a page 3 stunner! Take a look at Clive's report

Woe is me, I am taken with ill health - a tickly cough - it seems that my candle burning has left me with a scorched end.
The ladyfriend and I are off to Mr Clive and Mr Drew's (Fort Knox) for a seasonal supper this evening, wonderful.
Blink Blink

The lady friend and I are no spring chickens, we are exhausted and have had too much fun for one month and have both decided to give Santa's Kingdom a miss. It's been on watchdog and exposed as a scam so, instead of being duped old saps we've decided not to bother going.
We don't seem to have stopped since Amsterdam and the camel's back has been broken and is in traction. So this weekend has morphed into a most beautiful and relaxed weekend. The most pressing thing we have to do is buy a Christmas tree. :)

32 today and I still have the skin of a Princess

Well God has shone his face upon me today as it is my birthday and my ladyfriend has given me a huge f*ck off granite pestle and mortar, I also got the Nigella Bites book (a gap in the collection), wine, bubble bath and socks! Oh happy day.
Tonight I am off out with friends and tomorrow to Santa's Kingdom (which everyone has told me is crap - it was even on Watchdog last night)
I am going to see an open air nativity production (approx run time 35mins) on Saturday and decking the halls on Sunday. Got to ice the cake on Sunday and all. This is the busiest time of year.

One more day until my birthday and I am feeling in a nice mood. I have just had an email from someone to do with the Greenford Baptist Church (I am trying to put a list of Christmas church events on the website at work) and at the bottom he put "May God bless you and keep you and make His face to shine upon you and give you peace!" - Now isn't that nice? It certainly has put a spring in my step. Visit their site at http://www.gbc.org.uk and you too can find inner calm.

Mr Clive and Mr Drew have suffered a break in at their house and I am so sad for them. The suspects are a teenage gang which the police are close to identifying. It makes me so angry that society is plagued by vermin like these. I call for curfews which see kids inside after dark or the parents locked up.
England is going to the dogs, we are over run with scum. I want a strong arm on the law, kids smacked, the cane brought back in, zero tolerance, the benefit system reduced and decency restored.

Just popped outside and it is snowing (well tiny little round white things) the sky is pregnant with the stuff and you can just feel the contractions of Mother Nature.
Last night I had a wonderful chinese at Dawn and Dave's who have decked the front of their house out like Blackpool, it is the very worst in taste but also the very best! I am quite sure, like the great wall of china, you can see it from space.

Ooooh, aint it chilly? last night, my God. The ladyfriend and I were sitting in Dorchester Abbey in Arctic conditions whilst a group of men did that Gregorian chant thing, what was billed as Medieval Carols turned into the dullest hour and a half of my life - and the coldest.
I thought it was going to be lovely and I'd come away buoyed on merriment and exuding yuletide enthusiasm from every pore, I've never felt so depressed or morbid.
There were a lot of old women in there last night, perishing cold, they won't see another Christmas.

Today I am going to live the life of a recluse, my ladyfriend has taken her mother shopping and I have the run of the house. I can't face the thought of the shops on a saturday so I shall not stick a toe out of the door. This weekend we have been promised snow! Oh joy upon joys!
I went to Bath yesterday with Mr Clive and Mr Drew, it was a very nice day, they spend money like water them two, it will be the poor house in the future for them two. I'll have to spring them from stir in a dare devil rescue.
I am going to cook a shoulder of lamb tonight, how should I do it? Traditional? Moroccon? Boiled? Baked? Basted? I must emerse myself in Nigella, Delia or Jamie.

Tonight I have decided to do a 'lil' late night Christmas shopping, I don't really have to infact I am quite prepared, I just like the idea that I can. I think I shall have a mince around John Lewis, peruse the wine in Asda (whatever people say they do keep prices to a minimum) then motor over to Marlow - a much favoured town.

I am sure I will come away with nothing but ill feeling after being pushed and shoved by rough, roudy types.

Tomorrow I am off to the Bath Christmas Market with Mr Drew and Mr Clive, that will be lovely. I like sitting in their car as they always provide a flask of hot coffee, mugs and cakes in the back. They play cheerful music and apart from Mr Clive's tendency to take his hands off the wheel to gesticulate during conversation, I feel quite safe.

I am very excited (beyond my wildest dreams) as on Sunday I am going to visit Dorchester Abbey to hear Medieval carols being sung! Hooraah and hey nonny nonny.

Blimey, at last they seem to have fixed the problem (for technical reasons I was unable to post yesterday, it's a bit frustrating, this website has become a bit of an addiction and I get quite twitchy when it stops working).

Had to get the "free with Ideal Home" Christmas calender out last night as December is getting booked up quicker than a ear syringing clinic at a cottage hospital. It's amazing I've got to Ice a cake, buy presents, send cards, go to Glastonbury, go to see Maddy Prior, run a wreath making workshop (complete with handouts - I won't have note takers) AND go to Santa's Kingdom........oh and have my birthday next Thursday.

Now I have it all laid out on a month to view calender it's a little more organized and intend to run this Christmas with military precision.

Back at work today but the fun never ends! Planning has already begun for the weekend where the Bath christmas market is running until the 8th December!
What larks, the ladyfriend and I are trying to work out the best day to go, word has gone out to Mr Clive and Mr Drew who share the same appetite for Christmas Tide.

Lit my advent candle last night as I had two days to burn, you have to watch those things like a hawk as one slip of concentration and the next thing you know you've burnt a whole week.

Back in England after a brief sojourn in Amsterdam. What a lovely place, fantastic architecture. Last night I was in a brilliant gay bar where three trannies were bingo calling. had a wonderful time. Every one smokes though, in the restaurants, on the trains, everywhere. I've come home smelling like the carpet in the British Legion. Really quick flight, I didn't even reach the horoscopes in my Womens Weekly it was that quick.